Enjoy holiday parenting and take quality time to connect with your children. This time you have with your children is your best time with them, and we discuss some ways you can make the most of it and prepare for the year to come.
As the holiday season approaches, you may find yourself in the midst of spending a lot more time with your children; no schedules, no routines, no bedtime curfews, just you covering the basics – mealtimes, rest times, and fun times. This quality time you have with your children is your best time with them, and here are some ways you can make the most of it and prepare for the year to come.
YOUR MINDSET DURING THE HOLIDAYS
Do not stress about how your family appears, single parent or not, involved extended family or not. Your children have been looking forward to spending this holiday break with you. Shake off the constant demands of your work schedule and colleagues and give your children as much affection and attention as you can muster.
REFRAME YOUR THOUGHT PROCESSES
Tell yourself that it’s not the end of the world if you all skip a healthy meal now and again and indulge in the lighter side of life. You are allowed to have a treat, food-wise and fun-wise. Do childish activities with them and share your favourite foods and times with them.
GET TO KNOW YOUR CHILDREN
Have heart-to-heart chats and listen attentively while they talk. Control the voices in your head that tell you to hurry them up or dole out instructions continuously. Explore what they have accomplished throughout the year, such as growing a few centimetres taller or moving up a shoe size. Keep your conversations positive and motivational to help them look forward to the New Year, but don’t brush aside any complaints or serious discussions they want to have with you. Encourage them to talk and express themselves by asking open-ended questions such as:
- “How do you feel about…?” “How do they make you feel…?”
- “What do you think could be a few ways you handle this…?”
THE VOICE OF YOUR CHILDREN
The Children’s Act 38 of 2005 of South Africa protects the voice of our children. You must let them know how important their voice is to them and for them.
- Teach your children to speak up and to speak for themselves.
- Practice talking loudly and assertively with them so that their confidence comes out in their voices, and teach them the difference between respectful words and disrespectful, hurtful words.
- Show them how their voice can be used as a weapon in any situation and how not to be afraid to call out for help.
LIVE IN THE MOMENT
This is the season to be grateful and to show gratitude. First and foremost, show your children love. Teach them the value of gratitude and give them opportunities where they can show gratitude to others, and share moments where they were grateful to someone.
Your quality time with your children should be just that, filled with memories and moments that will bring out the best in you and them. Empower your children to know that you can be trusted to be there for them and that you lead by example. I wish you an amazing holiday season and may the New Year bring you everything you hope for.
